Not a bad day yesterday. I got up and felt good so I arranged to have lunch with a couple of girlfriends while mom and dad watched Claire. Thank you Janet and Sharon and thank you mom and dad. Driving to my parents to pick Claire up, I suddenly felt tired. This irritated me! Got Claire and we both went home and took 2 hour naps. I still felt tired!
This whole process is upsetting. What should have been a beautiful day to be out walking, was marred by my tiredness. After dinner I called my friend Michelle. She is the only one who has been in my shoes. She received the same treatment etc... As soon as she said what is wrong, I started crying (yes, again!) and told her I didn't even know. But I did...I told her. I came to realize today that even when you say you are having a "good day," your good days aren't even that good. You still feel tired and worn out for no reason. And the more chemo my body receives, the more tired I will become. Dr O told me I would do things at half the speed I am used to. Half my butt! Ha! I feel like I am doing things a quarter of what I am used to.
I just feel this is going to be a hard summer. I can't be out in the sun or I will burn, yet I have to get Claire out and play with her. See, you can tell that I am a worrier. All these things to think about and consider.
I told Dennis last night to feel free to go up North this summer by himself to his class reunion because there was no way I would be able to handle the trip that far. 10-12 hours. This is just not the summer to plan ahead or to plan a long trip.
I keep telling myself that it is only one year out of my entire life. Even this is wearing thin and not really helping me.
I guess this is a whiny post. So here is to you my dear friend Cynthia who gave me permission to whine! Love ya!
I look forward to a Friday filled with laughter and fun with Jen, Mia, and Beth Anne.
Blessings!