This week has been crappy to say the least. Claire still has her ear infection. We changed the antibiotics so hopefully that will help. She missed yesterday at school because I wanted to make sure her fever had broke. I hate her missing school because she misses her therapies then as well. But I realize in the scheme of things that her health is the most important thing. I can't wait to get to our Riley appt and talk about tubes.
Yesterday I felt like crap. It was just a crappy day all around. I am still having stomach issues. I am calling the surgeon today and see how long this is suppose to last. I can't eat, and then when I do eat, it usually comes back up! I am scared to be losing weight this fast. I know it is not healthy and I am not enjoying it either. I would rather be fat and healthy!
Last night I had a major meltdown. So for all of you that think this does not happen with me, believe me it does. I just figure no one likes to hear a whiner!
My sister and her fam watched Claire so that Dennis and I could meet some co-workers and ex co-workers for dinner. The whole time I was not feeling well. I came home and got sick. I just starting bawling. I told Dennis, I hate this cancer!" If it had not been for the cancer, I would not have had the surgery and I would not be feeling like crap! I just could not stop crying. I would have to say that this is the first time I really bawled like this in a long time. My sister brought Claire home and we talked. Ok, she talked and I cried more! And then we prayed together. This really calmed me down. I love the power of prayer! And for those that feel you don't know how to pray, it is easy really! I just feel like I am having a conversation with God all the time. And I feel him talking back to me in my heart. He does know our needs.
I just keep thinking of how he suffered on the cross for us.
I just try and stay positive even when I feel like crap. I know this can't last forever!
Have a wonderful blessed weekend!